“Mawwaige”….hands down the most difficult thing I have ever done…and I’m not done. Some say the most challenging things we do reap the greatest rewards. My children not withstanding, I plead the fifth on that at this time. We have just spent the second night in our new home. As foretold in previous blogs, the Paint Nazi has not finished painting but like a very aggressive cow in a china shop I moved in anyway. For those of you unfamiliar, the Paint Nazi is my husband. I hate that word…HUSBAND. It is a weird word. Almost as weird as wife. Anyway, we moved in not a moment too soon. The Paint Nazi are like two panthers in a cage circling back and forth just waiting for the other to say something wrong or look cross ways so they can attack. Hence the larger home gives us more cage space and keeps us from the inevitable. When forced to sit close together our children have to witness the sad, regression of maturity when one says to the other “You’re touching me!” When one of us dares to make a joke the others’ defenses rise quickly and the response is usually “You think you are so funny don’t you?” Unless, you just get the kiss of death…the rolling of the eyes. Yes, I’ll admit it, like most women, the rolling of the eyes is my favorite response to give. It is a perfect response and I’ll cop to it. Maybe some of you relate to this maybe some of you do not. If you don’t and you are married, let me offer my sincere congratulations on your recent nuptials! Please do not build or remodel a house any time soon! My view on marriage after 22 years, okay, sometimes a little cynical. However, I have learned a thing or two. Getting married is like trying to force two countries to co-exist. I don’t care if you think you have everything in common. You grew up in two different houses and were taught two completely different ways to live. How to fold towels, if you fold towels, do you fold your sox or roll your sox, how do you spell socks? Do you eat canned corn or frozen corn, do you eat white tortilla chips or yellow tortilla chips, how often do you vacuum, again, do you vacuum? And those are just the little things. So stop right there! I have had to do the same thing after 22 years and stop right there. THOSE ARE JUST LITTLE THINGS. Life is good. Later.